funniest10k:

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im so over being taken advantage of.

i wish that someone would take care of me.

instead of me ALWAYS taking care of him and doing everything out of consideration.

i do it because i THINK you would do the same for me. 

but you DONT.

i was excited, my parents said that they would pay for my ticket out to california. but, now they aren’t. so that fucks up everything. and now, i have no idea when im even going to go out there. unless i hit a fucking lottery, it wont be for a while. i miss my family, and i miss my friends. but i don’t make enough to save for a ticket, and pay for bills. 

i’ve been kind of feeling down lately. mainly that its all my fault relationships that ive had and that have gone to shit have been my fault. i try so hard with every relationship im in, no matter what it is. friendships, intimate relationships (boyfriends), anything, i feel like it turns to hell because of something that i did, or the way that i am. i put my heart in everything that i do, and because of that, i get hurt. i try so hard to make things perfect, and be the perfect friend/girlfriend. i do things for people that i think and hope they would do for me in return. and i get disappointed when i don’t get it back. 

i feel like an extremely outgoing person, i’d give you anything if it meant it’d help you out, or make you happy in someway. like i would assume someone would do for me. but a lot of the time that doesnt happen for me. and because of that i try harder and harder to please that person, until it pushes them away. when in reality, they never wanted anything to do with me to begin with. i think i need to get the fact that you can’t give everyone everything, and leave nothing for myself.  because then it leaves me feeling like i do now. pretty much really fucking horrible. im ready to crawl under a rock and cry.